AlexaStauffer_picWhen I wake up in the morning, I’m not the most beautiful site. I don’t think any of us could really admit to looking 100% the moment we roll over to turn off our alarm and wipe the drool from our chin. I hardly ever want to get up from my super warm pillow infested bed, but when I finally do and look in the mirror, I cannot wait to fix the mess I see reflecting back at me.

Somewhere, at some point in time, society started telling women that the only thing wrong with who they are was EVERYTHING. It obviously wasn’t a notion that came all at once, instead it was a snowball effect, a snowball rolling down a mountainside picking a new flaw with every roll and tumble.

Women started wearing make up, starving or fattening themselves for the ideal body of the time period, and have even gone to the extent of cosmetic surgeries. I personally know women with tattooed eyebrows, breast implants, Botox, collagen, and more, just for the sake of their own beauty. Don’t get me wrong, I completely understand the stories of  women getting breast implants after having a mastectomy to remove or prevent cancer, but to get some kind of cosmetic reconstruction just because you want to appear more like what society finds as the “ideal look” hurts not only my heart but your Creator’s. He made you in His image. To alter that, in my opinion, would be immensely vain.

I noticed I was beginning to experience a problem with vanity when I went home for Christmas Break this year. I decided to do something about it. I was going to give up wearing makeup for the Lenten Season. Forty days without makeup seemed easy when I was thinking about it. Since I’m a cheerleader at my university and it was still basketball season, I made the exception that I would wear makeup for the final three games and that was it. I also made an exception for a photo shoot that was scheduled for an on-campus organization.

The process was going well at first. I realized I could sleep in a little later because I didn’t need to use that time to get ready. I didn’t have to scrub my face every night Selfie Collagetrying to get every bit of makeup off that was caked on my face. My face could breath and all was well. Then, vulnerability attacked. I started feeling ugly, unpresentable, gross. I would wear my glasses more to cover the fact that my eyelashes almost looked nonexistent. I would pray my acne would go away so I wasn’t tempted to use concealer or foundation.

Those made up values by makeup started attacking me from every direction. I was the only one not wearing makeup at one of my sorority formals. I got weird looks from high schoolers when I was recruiting for cheerleading at the State Cheer Competition. I met my boyfriend’s parents and went on a Valentine’s Day date without makeup on. It was so odd being so vulnerable, so I started taking a selfie every moment I felt less than society’s standards. I have gone back and looked at all of them and I could not be more upset with myself. I LOOKED FINE. Why are we so dependent on the outside beauty forces of nature and so against accepting what was naturally given to us?

My boyfriend, friends, and family were really a great foundation for me during this project. They would give me boosts of encouragement, shoutouts on social media, and compliment me. This was wonderful to have, especially on the tough days. The day of my New Student Program photo shoot, March 20, 2016, was a major day for me. Like I stated before, I made an exception to wear makeup this day. When we were done, I took the makeup off. The key moment was taking the makeup off. This was the first time in my entire life that when I took my makeup off, I did not feel like I was removing ANY beauty. When I would wash my makeup of my face, I used to make jokes that I was “going to go take the pretty off.” This would upset my boyfriend because he’s able to see my true beauty.

IMG_7112What made this day standout is that for the first time I didn’t see a difference in either image. With or without makeup, I saw beauty; this was ground breaking for me. The moment I told my mom about it, she had tears in her eyes. I was finally able to see the fearfully and wonderfully made woman she saw. In this moment, I knew my Lenten sacrifice was perfect. Sure I still love putting on makeup and highlighting my features, but I no longer live in vain and I no longer depend on these Made Up Values by Makeup.

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