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We are constantly told that we should emphasize and work with our strengths. With the same intent, we are also told that we should accept our limits and work within those limitations.

We live in a world that is conceptualized and limited by our thoughts and perceptions. Of course, it is great to recognize and appreciate your authentic strengths, but the key is that while these strengths are a part of you, they do not define you. When we have a narrative about ourselves (weaknesses and even strong suits with which we define ourselves), we put ourselves in a box. Everything outside of that box is seen as untouchable or out of our league.

What are your strong suits? What are the qualities you are most proud of, and that you have relied on for successful outcomes in the past? Maybe you’re organized, you have good time management skills, you’re compassionate, independent, creative. Recognize your strengths, because yes, they are authentic and they are part of you. But that’s where they end, they are only a part of you, they are not ALL of you. You have strengths, but you are not your strengths. Relying on strengths is not the end-all, be-all for success and happiness. Strengths are just part of a much bigger picture.

When we make up our minds that we are one way, we imply that we cannot be some other way if the situation calls for it. Then that situation becomes something that we cannot cope with, a situation in which we cannot thrive. And that is where our strengths limit us. Perhaps you define yourself as “independent.” If you let that strength control your life, you may be afraid to ask for help when you need it or feel like you cannot work cooperatively with a group. Additionally, in an instance where our strength fails us, we feel we have lost our strength entirely. We have let ourselves down and we feel like a failure because we failed at our own game. In these instances, our strengths control and constrain us, and they work against us. Your strengths can get you into trouble if you let them take the reigns.

Image of opened white note book with a pen, and This Is My Story words written on it

This is where both strengths and weaknesses limit our perceived possibilities. The human body has limits, we can only go so long without food and water, we can stand a limited range of temperatures. Our minds, on the other hand, impose their own limitations. If you think you can’t run a marathon, you will limit your body to confirm that belief and you might never even begin training. If you think you can’t excel in a certain field, you will always act in a way that will confirm that, and you will overlook any opportunities to build on the skills involved in that particular craft. Rather than centering our lives around our strengths and staying within the constraints, we must instead learn to DIRECT our strength.

Thomas Edison was believed to have dyslexia and ADHD, yet he consumed novels and made significant scientific breakthroughs. If he had simply let these weaknesses rule his life, and dictate what he can and cannot do, he would not have been able to make these breakthroughs. This day in age, there are several brilliant writers diagnosed with dyslexia, and though their circumstances may pose difficulties, they are aware that a diagnosis does not put up a brick wall. That brick wall is only there if you say it is. Are these writers miraculous humans? No, they realized they had a choice. They could have whined and questioned their disability, or accepted it and worked with it. It did not matter to them how much easier it was for other people. With passion and belief, they pushed past.

Becoming whatever you want to do starts with believing in your infinite possibility, regardless of your strong suits, regardless of your weaknesses, regardless of what has limited you in the past. Do not let your narrative define you. You are so much more than your story.

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